Malicious Mischief

2007-02-04T16:14:00.000+08:00

She brings me close to a soul I was once so acquainted with. A soul whose heart once pulsated as one with mine. A soul whose world I often saw through in her mesmerizing eyes.

www.whatbullareyoutalkingabout.blogspot.com.

2007-01-22T11:53:00.000+08:00

Hey suckers, I've (most probably)moved, thank you very much. Ask me on MSN if you bother to. Or I will tell you if I decide to. In the meantime, linking back to this lame blog will do.

Whenever we're out together all eyes are on all her

2007-01-16T03:54:00.000+08:00

Sorry but I couldn't resist.

Okay I really quit school. I'm bleeding like fuck and tomorrow I think I'm calling the agency to look for a vacancy, I hope. I'm like some aimless wanderer now and my sms is exceeding and soon my bill will exceed and my sister is going to kill me.

I remember Hole telling me about Yuki and yuck, Yuki you turn me off. I hate to say this but you bring shame to what's already left of our school. AND BY THE WAY, I SAW SEBASTIAN'S PIC AND HE IS BOTAK(HAHAHAHAHA). I've been such a bitch lately and no it's not because of PMS. PMS as in pre-menstrual syndrome, not pre-marital sex. Okay maybe it's because of PMS which made me feel like some stupid fug, but I want to find twits to bitch about(I'm so nice I only do twits) and I want attention. I feel so lonely suddenly. My only friend is Xavier, and he is imaginary.

You know what, I'm thinking of shifting this goddamn blog.

I'm hungry. :( I still miss the old times and I miss the times I said I wanna eat an Oreo cheesecake from Starbucks. I miss writing letters and drawing stupid stuff on them... I miss the times when I could just laze at my desk and drool to sleep while listening to my mp3 during free periods. I miss having the girls around me talking bullshit and laughing like crazy. I remember Cherlyn was always being so nice by helping to organize my locker stuff. I remember there was a time when I was upset and couldn't finish my work and everyone suddenly circled around me, took the colour pencils and helped me colour my stuff and brightened up my day.

I remember I used to run away from Gek during Amath because she would always force me to stay in class even if I was having free periods. I would hide in the library and later sneak into the classroom from the back door and squat behind Cherlyn, then secretly chat with her at the back. Gek was forever so patient with me. If I didn't bring my Emath materials, she would sometimes lend her mine or help me find one. I never really did her homework and she never really chased after me for them(I wonder why she chased after the others). I miss Hole and it makes my day whenever she drops little things on my desk early in the morning. I remember Eunice the slutty secretary always hugs me so tightly and does sick little things with me.

Okay shit I'm stuck in the past. But I love my memories. I wonder how the hell I used to write in my letters, if anyone of you still keep any of my crappy letters kindly throw them away, because I know they're definitely gonna reflect how bullshitty I am in the past haha.

God I wanna eat Oreo cheesecake. Pfft.

2007-01-13T23:52:00.001+08:00

Blogging is a chore, reading is a PITA. I guess I'm getting out of here.

Pluto isn't part of the planet system, and guess what? You can find me there.

Goodbye!

2007-01-13T23:43:00.000+08:00

Hihi I'm at my sister's place again and I happened to find some interesting pictures in my documents.

I was trying some stuff on photoshop and played around with those two images.

At Show's autograph a 43231 years ago.

I was at Genting.

I never took this ride.

That's Jessica my cousin, I think I remember myself telling her that she looked ghostly in this picure haha.

And this is Edwin, Jessica's brother and my cousin. He's an annoying smart little boy and I make fun of him.

Haha okay bye.

2007-01-13T14:02:00.000+08:00

I just got to know a girl named Pinky, and she says she loves my name because she is a fan of Angela Zhang Shao Han. When we exchanged our contacts, I told her that I would be quitting school and she responded with a shocked face. And all of a sudden I can't bear to leave. SHIIIIIT. Alright, I'm not that sentimental actually. Reason why I'm leaving Pee Jay See for good is that I hate the lectures there, I don't wanna go for PE and I have no interest in the subjects I'm taking. Fuck I'm such a lazy ass. (please don't think I quit school because there's no eyecandies - actually there aren't any anyway)

I bumped into Cecilia yesterday at Tiong Bahru and it was such a horrible coincidence because she actually caught me scandalizing on the spot. I was being such a retard towards her at the control station yesterday. And I ponned my lectures yesterday morning so I practically napped through the entire morning at the canteen with Claudia. We had our first class interaction later in the day so I got to know new people. There was a pair of twins and then this Bukit Batok girl who seemed really amiable and nice to be friends with. But looks like I'm never gonna get to know them more... since I'm quitting.

I went back to Crescent for CCA day and slacked around the booth with Kelly. It was raining quite heavily then and the girls were all so loud and shrilly(shit I miss the old times). I saw Hole and Wai Man and I saw many familiar faces and I bumped into Fucker outside the library(FUCKER I MISS YOU). After the booths were cleared by the end of the day, Kelly and I went to Mac's and we reminisced the old times. Old as in not really the really old times but you know, the old times. And we talked about Cheetah.

Wai Man is giving tuitions to kids and when I asked her for lobangs, she doubted my sincerity and refused to believe that my ambition is to BECOME A TEACHER(okay actually it's not really my main goal since I'm more into designing), but HEY, I CAN TEACH. I'm nice and friendly and I love kids. Believe it or not, I was about to join the Reading Club in Pee Jay See and read books to little kids. And no, I won't be reading them in hokkien. My mission is to read books to kids and make them and myself happy.

Okay I'm gonna get my mom to call the school on Monday and help me opt out of this wonderful shit. Byebye Pee Jay, I'll miss some of you. And Claudia be careful when you go to school every morning, I just got to know a STALKER eeew.

2007-01-11T19:08:00.000+08:00

Pee Jay is like goddamn boring and I'm rotting to bits and pieces in the lecture halls. If I have bothered to work harder, I would probably be in See Jay now with all the IJ eyecandies. But well you all know I prolly never would. And I forgot to borrow my slut uniform even though I think I'm quitting school next week!(and the potential provider isn't replying me shit)

Cecillia messaged me this afternoon but I fell asleep halfway. I bet she misses me since she asked me why I'm quitting school soon(and refuses to admit it), and everyone's calling me pig cause I'm just so lazy whenever it comes to everything. But I can't stop smiling like an idiot wherever she replies me, because her candid photo keeps popping up on my screen whenever she sends me a message. So does Melissa's, which amuses me pretty much. And right now Hen Jian is telling me supposedly funny jokes which do not seem to be funny at all, but I'm equally entertained.

By the way I think I've already figured out who that girl in the picture is, I just saw her on the bus today(I give it an eight!). And to my recent discoveries Tinkerbell just got her heart broken, I hope someone fixes it for her soon. I wonder who will return to school tomorrow for CCA day? Probaby quite alot of people... Perhaps I would see CG there and maybe I would talk to her if I do. And thank God and heaven and earth and hell, I don't have PE this week which means I won't get to run 3km for heaven's sake. It will probably kill me just to run and I hate running.

Today I ponned lessons and took a different route home so Claud and I boarded the bus to town. She actually suffered from motion sickness(it's the first time anyone puked before I did) so we stopped at Heeren and went to the washroom for her to empty her stomach. When she came out, she announced proudly in Chinese, "aah, I don't ever wanna get pregnant again." Hello we're in our Fairfield uniforms, how could you say that and ruin the school's image!!!

And I actually attended GSC with Claud(although I wasn't supposed to take that subject and never aced it). It was actually pretty fun and I kept mimicking the teacher and slept through most of it. The ah bengs in the room actually aced their Chinese and it's so scary because their Chinese is so good. The teacher even thought everyone attended GSC(but in fact there was one missing dude and I replaced him).

MY SISTER JUST BOUGHT THIS AYUMI MAG AND THERE'S MIKA AT THE BACK. She's so hawt(even better than Vivian haha Claud are you satisfied).

Aiya, wo hao men ah. Anyone coming to Pee Jay tomorrow PAY ME A VISITKTHXBYE.

有誰能比我知道妳的溫柔像羽毛

2007-01-10T19:19:00.000+08:00

Today I walked to the bus-stop with Fera and shared the umbrella with her since Claudia wanted to brave the rain. And it was also only today did I also realize that Fera actually has a very sweet voice.

Mass lectures were a goddamn bore and I couldn't help but doze off now and then, as much as the position to sleep in may not be exactly comfortable. I was supposed to pon H2 Math with Claudia, only to realize that I wasn't supposed to have any Math since I'm taking it as a H1 subject. Anyway, we ended up stoning at the back of the lecture hall. We kept walking into the wrong lecture theatres early this morning and was so confused with the venues of our lessons. Sometimes we can be such retards.

Today I saw someone in Pai Near Jay See who actually resembled Cheetah/Lion from Crescent. I wonder if she runs as fast as The Legend(HAHAHA). And Claudia cracks me up so much. I was so embarrassed when she actually picked the wrong time to say the wrong things(I hope those words do not get to someone's ears). Thank God nobody turned their heads to look at us upon hearing what was spilled out of the said person's mouth. Anyway, lessons ended pretty early, at around 12:30PM, so we went back to Crescent to visit our teachers. Honestly I never thought I would go back there and actually miss the feeling of being back in that school. I even miss the Crescent toilets.

I saw a number of familiar faces when I went back there(i.e. Pigu, Hole). Then I also saw the Guides Girl. I had my usual banana milkshake in the canteen with the rest who came later(Hui Si and Li Ting) and I spotted this nerd watching Hana Kimi on her tablet while having her lunch(which pretty much pissed me off since she was enjoying watching Ella on her tablet while digging into her food). Whatever happened to Crescent? Eyecandy materials no longer exist here. All I see are little kids running around the canteen and playing netball at the parade square.

When Li Ting mentioned the girls from _____, Claudia had to chuck me this look which reminded me of shame and accusation. I wonder why she always does that whenever such sensitive topics are touched upon. And Hui Si showed us something extremely amusing and sick, which reminded me of the 'nut' that some other guy was saying during the Lit talk last week. Claudia said there were sexual connotations involved within the word itself but I just didn't get it. Shit I'm so naive and innocent.

We talked to Azilah and Gek and I miss them so much. I bet Gek really misses 4S1, we're probably the only class which made her run around the school(and left one of the deepest impressions). I miss studying in an all girls' school, where all you hear are high-pitched screams, laughter and noises. I miss my old territory, man. And when I looked at the house board, all I could think of was how much disappointment the Fry ex captain would feel just as when she sees the position we now stand at. Yeah, you all know who I'm talking about. She was the only person who probably managed to bring glory to Fry.

And Hui Si and Li Ting couldn't stop laughing whenever Claud and I talk of the Ah Beng cheer we have in Pai Near.

"Boo ka li chao tah!"

"Zhai boh, swee boh, steady boh?"

Seriously, Pai Near is probably meant for me.

2007-01-07T02:26:00.000+08:00

Hi bitches, three long days of orientation have finally passed! I'm so glad to be able to not wake up at 5:30AM in the morning today, do my own shit and watch my TV and go out with my palzz. The past three days have not exactly been thrilling, but the second and third day as compared to the first were considered much better. Or rather, less annoying. I've made/known quite a number of people, played lame games with one another, did mass dance and screwed up and got laughed by my partner, known a girl called Melissa too, and travelled a long way back and forth consecutively for three days wasting my money and time.

Melissa is fun to talk to and amuse, Cecilia is a really funny bimbo/ah lian with loud laughters(somewhat slightly similar to Nishikado) and one of my OG leaders, Jonathan, behaves in a very weird and funny manner and I always enjoy mimicking his flimsy actions in front of Melissa. His second name is Jona and he's one quarter of a man. My other OG leader Si Hui on the other hand is more manly but as fun and entertaining as well.

Yesterday's outdoor wet activities at the field made me sunburnt so now I have darker/reddish arms, ears and neck. My head is scorched so maybe I expect to see crisps of scalp skin falling off my hair soon. The games were quite enjoyable but a total waste of time. The talks only discouraged me from wanting to study in a Jay See and I really dread PE because my physical fitness is F+ now. Every morning I feel like whining about having to slip on my crescent uniform and wearing my irritating track shoes(which are dying soon) and travelling a long distance to school.

I miss my friends from Crescent and I don't see Pearleen anywhere, I think she's having too much fun in CJ especially when she has eyecandies to spend her time with. Melissa told me her (single)school has no such thing as eyecandies and I was pretty amazed and appalled at the same time. Not that my life exists only for eyecandies, besides the school is for freaks like me hehez(kiddingz, the cultures with one another don't blend at all, since PJ is so unique and cool). Cecilia cracks me up so much because she thought bungs are "bunks from the army", and when the other girl joked and asked her if she was straight, she replied innocently, "you mean straightforward?"

I sleep at about 8-9AM everyday and once I hit 6 hours, I'm as awake as an owl and my body refuses to shut down, causing me to have nights of despair and emo-ness. School dismissal time was delayed for almost more than an hour because of this gayshit who had verbal diarrhoea on stage, bullshitting away and becoming the reason why Claudia and I arrived at Crescent for the Sec 1 campfire late later in the evening.

I miss all my friends. We laughed like we're expecting to die tomorrow and Crank's Mate had to come and squash my face with her hands when she saw me at the canteen. I miss the Crescent kids screaming in such high-pitched voices, and I even recorded it down during the campfire and labelled it mentally as Mass Rape. After the campfire I headed to KFC with Kelly, Nishikado and Jean and I ate like a happy kid because I've not tasted KFC's food for almost a decade already. By the time I was home, I was officially brain dead and collapsed on my bed for a long and goodnight's rest(quote unquote AiAi).

Today I met up with my good buddy Fatp and we went to Bugis since I had to buy new clothes(My mother initated it and gave me the money. Mummy wo hao ai ni lor!). I'm not a shopping kind of person(that is when I don't feel like it) but I Fatp is far worse off than me. It only took him 1 minute to start whining the moment we stepped into the hot and jampacked Bugis Street, and when we finally headed to the second storey where it was air-conditioned, he was good old quiet again. We watched Blood Diamond(digital) at The Cathay and it was pretty intriguing.

And when I came out of the washroom at Cathay, I saw this man walk out of the handicapped toilet. He looked pretty suspicious-looking and when he closed the toilet's door, he leaned to the door and said in Chinese, "take your time to dress up, I'm heading for the Men's first." I stared at him and had this almost invisible amused look on my face, and he saw me staring at him but ignored me anyway. After that when Fatp came out of the washroom I told him about the incident, and the girl happened to finally come out of the handicapped toilet, looking rather flushed or something.

It's nearing 4AM now, usually at this point of time I would either be sleeping or as awake as a piece of shit due to insomnia, or watching my brother play Call of Duty on his PS2. I'm glad I can have a goodnight's rest tonight. Monday sure as hell better take a million years to come.

I'm hungry.

2007-01-05T03:32:00.000+08:00

I hate Crescent but I miss the life there. I miss everyone.

2007-01-03T21:36:00.000+08:00

"So are you going to attend this for two months plus?"

"After today I think I want to go poly already."

Oh my God I can't wait to go to school tomorrow!!! There's this cool thing called Mass Dance, I think I can't wait man. Wowww!

Pearleen finally sent me some photos for grad night. Pearleen very cheeky ah!!! Post a photo of two persons even though you're not in it.

2007-01-03T16:10:00.000+08:00

I had a really wonderful time in school today.

Earlier this morning, I almost missed my bus to the train station. The bus ride to Queenstown was only about five to ten minutes, but it was horribly long enough for me since I was struggling with the nauseating feeling overwhelming me. Not that I was experiencing motion sickness, but it because I drank large gulpfuls of water(and some sinful coffee) before heading out of the house, thus the queasy feeling causing me to have the urge to vomit. I had to hold on to my stomach to suppress the horrible sensation, and the next moment my hands were already covering my mouth as my throat threatened to erupt.

By then I had already reached my stop, so I quickly alighted my bus and the first thing I noticed was the canal next to the bus-stop(somewhat packed with a number of people), so I ran towards it and threw up into the canal(followed by a few times of spitting into the canal as well) before whipping out my phone to call Claudia, "OMG I PUKED!!!"

A passerby saw the scene and looked at my face in some sort of bewilderment. Hey, at least I didn't puke on the bus right? I would have probably threwn up all over my clothes. Anyway, that was indeed a great start for a day. I met up with Claudia at the control station and headed to the washroom for a quick wash up before boarding the train. She told me she was glad to have someone to attend the same school as her, and I was rather amused by the things she said later on in the train. Apparently she has no sense of directions and couldn't remember the way to get there. Thank God for her, she had me to guide the way.

It was definitely a pain in the ass to wake up that early for school. As we were walking that goddamn long path to the college with a bunch of kids, we noticed something about the few girls walking ahead of us. Then I turned to Claudia and before I even said anything, she mouthed the sacred word and we both exchanged a funny smirk. She had actually said my thoughts out. We think on the same wavelength, apparently.

I met a lot of familiar faces, some from my school and some from others. We were separated into different groups with different OG leaders. One of my leaders had an uncanny resemblance to Audrey. Even the smile seemed exactly the same. She was pretty high, I don't know why, but she seemed fun. The rest of the day was a total dread. We spent the whole morning planting our asses on the floors of the hall, listening to talks and more talks.

Apparently I forgot to switch off my recurrent alarm(which rings at 8:15AM), so when it started buzzing in my bag, I thought it was someone who had phoned me, so I took out my phone and to my horror realized it was screaming, "fucker pick up the phone la you idiot!!!"

Thankfully it wasn't that loud(it increasing in volume) and I quickly turned it off. But I didn't switch it off completely. It had to ring again after some time and I almost died on the spot.

School ended around 2. School sucked. I think there are too many sluts, I don't like it(kidding).

On a lighter note, Happy Birthday Vivien. :)

2007-01-01T00:34:00.000+08:00

Finally another 365 days have whizzed or crawled by, and suddenly everyone has new resolutions for the year 2007. My new resolutions for this year? Hopefully I can manage my time well and get into my ideal course/stream(my decision between college or poly has still not been finalized), then make sure I do not screw up the remaining of my 364 days and lead a fulfilling life. Oh, and I hope to make new and nice friends too. If I end up in a class with no other girl wearing banana yellow blouse and pandan green skirt, I'd pray that the kids from other schools will not see me as an intimidating girl, since the colours for my uniform appear pretty threatening and outstanding.

One more day before school starts! How fun does that sound? I will have to make sure that my nails are cut and my hair is neat or trimmed(no more dye jobs). Not only that, I will have to be geared up for the 3-day orientation, where you'll have engage in various activities with a bunch of strangers and interact with one another. Wow, I absolutely look forward to it!(KNN)

I hate school. I hope I won't get motion sickness from all the travelling. I have to walk a distance to the bus-stop at the adjacent block every morning and take 195 to queenstown MRT station, then take the train to Jurong East, switch to Choa Chu Kang, and then take 190, alight at some flats, then walk a long distance to my new(temporary) school. How am I supposed to survive this bloody routine? D:~

(Stfu Angie)

My family and I had dinner at Toa Payoh. We had sinful butter crabs. I sure as hell finished up the eggs. They were horrendously tasty. My mom had a shaky front tooth and being a fearless heroine, she went ahead with the crab-eating procedure but ended up dropping her tooth in the end. Now she is missing one front tooth and I cannot stop laughing at her whenever she talks or laughs or nags("Don't talk so much lah, lose one tooth already still want to talk?").

When the clock struck twelve, my brother and his girlfriend and I went to the back of the kitchen to check out the fireworks(thinking there would be fireworks since I was able to see the fireworks from Vivo the previous time), but in the end we couldn't spot anything, so we got out of the apartment and managed a glimpse of the beautiful fireworks from Mount Faber.

When everything finally came to an end, I crawled back to the house and sat down in front of my computer. That was how I spend the beginning of year 2007.

Happy New Year to everyone and may you have a great year ahead.

Some prom pics uploaded. I still haven't gotten those exclusive photos from some others.

2006-12-30T01:05:00.000+08:00

Looks like I carried the joke a little too far. All I merely mentioned was that I love sluts because they're a source of entertainment for me and now the little boy thinks I'm a lil weird and a lil lesbian. Thankfully, I did not introduce myself to you as Xavier, or told you about my love for Vivian Hsu and Elva Hsiao. I cannot withstand lame presumptions.

And now I've made people believe I'm a Satanist. Do you believe in afterlife? The demon dies but his soul takes on another form, in flesh and blood, a human being. Hey, I'm just kidding you, don't take my words too seriously. But I think the Satanic symbols are interesting. Don't slam me if you're a Christian, I was just joking. But hey, do you think that the dead are better than the living? They're patient, they do not cajole, nor tease. They hold no grudges. Unless you're talking about their souls.

2006-12-28T22:16:00.000+08:00

I have finally purchased a copy of Mephisto Club and you cannot see how gleeful I am.

'Christmas Eve in Boston is no holy night for medical examiner Dr Maura Isles.' - The Mephisto Club

2006-12-28T01:51:00.000+08:00

The holidays are finally ending. I wish this isn't happening, but eventually reality has to sink in, and in a few days time I see myself taking a long bus(and train) ride to my new school, settling down in another new environment which brings me the sense of familiarity I've felt back in Sec 1 and Primary 1: The feeling of the strangeness of it all.

Fatty isn't going anywhere and he says he is getting a job next month(which is good for him since he is lazy by nature like me), I hope he really means it but of course with money rolling in, it also does not mean he is going to keep all the money in his pocket. He'd better treat me to good food by the time he gets his first pay.

He thought that I wasn't giving him anything at all on Christmas after mere presumptions from a mere statement I've made("What if I didn't buy a Christmas present for you?"), so when I met him at the control station on that particular day, he came empty-handed. Well, I told him that if he had a conscience, he would jolly well buy me something nice on my birthday. He felt really bad about it, but I told him there was no need to feel this way. After all, it only goes to show that I have succeeded in tricking him to believing that I didn't buy anything for him for Christmas(and thus it came as a surprise to him when I handed him the plastic bag).

On Wednesday night we caught The Holiday at Great World. It had been raining the entire day and of course, draining my mood away at the same time - but nevertheless I went ahead with meeting him and he arrived in flipflops and a pyjamas-like-and-oversized T-shirt, carrying a large and almost redundant red umbrella with him. He kept sniggering and boasting about his large shirt, stating that it is comfy wearing oversized shirts(yes I know that, but you didn't have to say it to make me jealous since I came in a not-so-large shirt). Anyway the movie was heartwarming and sweet, albeit the typical romance storyline(I don't really watch romance movies, but it wouldn't do any harm joining the festive mood of "Love is all around you" eh?).

(Some spoilers ahead)

My impression of Jack Black was ruined when I watched Nacho Libre(I keep thinking that it's Nachos), but this time I would definitely say that he was certainly charming some way or another when he acted in The Holiday, and it did leave me with a new(and good) impression of him now. Jude Law looked like a typical jerk in the show but when he was finally exposed of his true identity(as a father/widow of two daughters), everything about him suddenly seemed so genuine and sweet - the way he interacted with his kids and how he showered concern on them. And the best part of him was when he wept. I think (good-looking)guys who cry are gorgeous. But of course I don't mean a good-looking guy can go around crying the whole day long and this goes for months(eventually he'll look gay doing this).

It was pouring when the movie ended, so when I walked to the bus-stop with Fatty, he was struggling to walk properly. Apparently his slippers were frictionless since the soles were worn, so there was a high probability of him slipping when he walked on the slipperly floor with his slippery slippers. The wind was quite harsh and kept messing up our hair. When he asked me where the wind was coming from, I said "there" and pointed to my left, only to realize I was pointing at a shop which was already closed. He started roaring with laughter(no idea why he found it that funny) and said that if he was gonna laugh further he might not be able to hold his pee. Anyway he did not pee by accident of course.

We managed to catch the bus home, he alighted at TBP with me and waited for my bus to come before walking home. I had to stop at some place since I was taking 123(I was supposed to take 195 but the last bus was missed), then I had to walk a distance home. It was still raining and I talked on the phone with Fatty during the journey, and when I reached my flat I saw my mom standing outside her unit like some ghost, staring down at me from the 8th level(I told her I had missed the last bus so she wanted to check if I made my way home safely just in case I died on my way).

Fatty just called me a few minutes ago at the airport and has already boarded the plane now on his way to South Africa(and most likely chomping away on his food greedily). He told me he had forgotten to bring my chocolates and cookies to eat on the plane and felt deeply regretful for not doing that. Well, I'm sure you'll have a feast when you get to South Africa(hopefully), Fatty!

Please come back soon though, I miss you!

2006-12-26T17:39:00.001+08:00

I hate blogging. I really do, lor.

2006-12-25T00:31:00.000+08:00

Aah, I finally know what is the change in me. I have lifted my emotional barrier. Is that a good thing(or not)?

Dear Santa,

__ __ ____.

Good night everyone. Merry Christmas. :- )

2006-12-24T19:36:00.000+08:00

I'm experiencing an emotional roller coaster ride on a Christmas Eve, how nice. Arguing over the very minor issues, feeling lousy and drowsy even though I've slept for more than ten hours. Even the rainy weather isn't helping me today. It only seems to dampen my mood further. My clique's going out tomorrow and yet I'm not joining them. Sorry guys, I would really love to come along but I've already planned it with someone else. I really hope we'll have another outing together again(either during one of the days next week or when school starts). And currently I'm having the hots for Elva(Claud probably has no say regarding this since it's not Vivian Hsu).

Curse of the golden flower in my personal opinion, is good. I felt that it was a pretty intriguing movie, except there were times where Jay Chou seemed to have distorted his face when he was struggling to fight back his tears. Gong Li's acting skills were awesome(I still think she reminds me a little of Yifang).

Aah, I'm talking to Clarissa online and she's presently in Paris. She told me she's been eating french toasts since this morning. Now I suddenly crave for the french toasts from Crystal Jade. It's been a long time since I've been there. My mom used to treat me to Crystal Jade whenever we're out together(she's pretty generous when it comes to food).

Clarissa just linked me to Rain's video "I'm Coming", and there was this comment by one of the viewers:

Jaxx77 (1 day ago):
rain's coming to sg...actually nt only sg but oso malaysia...recently keep raining...sg oso flooded wif rain le wor...of cuz rain is comin lah...rofl

2006-12-24T14:06:00.000+08:00

You know, I was reading some stuff and certain things came to my mind... It seemed as though every part of my past suddenly seemed like a facade. The things I did, the feelings I felt, everything suddenly became like an illusion to me, it was as though they were never meant to happen. They say past is a fiction. I changed for a reason, but is this reason going to keep me going far from where I am now? Right now I'm not doubting the cause of change, and it seems like everyone is contented(in fact, some relieved) about this. I tend to stray afar, but now I stay, and now I lie still here. I cannot forsee or predict what will happen in the future. And it scares me whenever I realize that I have hurt someone without knowing. Maybe not hurt, maybe just disappointed, but actually, I have no idea unless you decide to be frank with me. But actually, I would rather you'd not be frank.

On a lighter note, last night I was watching Guessx3 and at the end of the episode, they invited four contestants from the previous episodes(two who were girly-looking guys and two who were guyish-looking girls). Apparently one of the supposedly guyish-looking girls was pretty(although a little androgynous) and I thought she was really cute(!!!). She reminds me of cute Japanese girls. I love Japan.

2006-12-23T10:18:00.000+08:00

You're the paradise I thought I'd never find,
Now you're the heaven I pray to never lose.

You're my sanity and courage, my hope and dream,
With you here nothing is too far it seems.

Please take my hand, I give you my heart,
From this day on I hold faith we won't part.

I know you're afraid to give me your all,
But don't fight the feeling, or refuse the fall.

To you I hand over all that is me,
And when you look in my eyes, love you will see.

I cherish our yesterday,
I beseech our today,
and the sun shines a path to show us the way.

Thank you,

for carrying my bag for me all the time(even without me asking),

for tolerating my moodswings,

for being so forgiving,

for your handmade breakfast(even though the veggie really sucked),

for being the one doing all the talking most of the time(knowing that I'm usually ignorant and quiet),

for helping me eat up the food I cannot finish(most of the time),

for humouring me with your childishness and silliness,

and for a million things which I can go on forever and ever(or so I think).

It's okay if you're childish at times. It's alright to bring out the inner child in us once in a while or now and then. When you're overly childish, it balances our equation. At the times when you're insensible, I'm there to correct you, vice versa. It's okay when you game, because I get to game too. Your hair doesn't suck, so quit complaining about it. Your sister is right, purple suits you(not trying to hint anything) and you should wear purple because it's nice on you. And I thought you were planning to control your diet? Good Lord, what happened?

I received a really pleasant surprise this morning. Nobody has ever done anything enough to touch me this way. Thank you for everything. I love you. :)

(PS: Is that poem really done by you?)

2006-12-22T21:53:00.000+08:00

Hi, I'm Angie. Do you prefer me being a guy or a girl? I can be Angela, I can be Angie, or you can call me by my other favourite name Xavier. Basically, you have three choices to choose from. I can be miserably quiet, I can be insanely crazy, or I can communicate with you using slurred speeches if you'd like. I'm not human, I'm not a ghost, and I like Final Fantasy.

I realize I used to blog about every single thing without considering who would ever read them. Even though this isn't a really a public blog, I still do feel certain restrictions when it comes to blogging down my thoughts.

Great, all of a sudden I'm swept over by a wave of giddiness and I feel like puking.

I miss Pearleen, she told me she just came back from Genting and the first thing I asked her was the food there. As expected, she told me the food sucked. Good. Now I have someone who agrees with me that the food there sucks. The food there tasted so great, I've had bad moods throughout my entire trip because I couldn't find any good food to fill my tummy. But thank God there was a Chinese restaurant which served good food, but anyway I vow never to visit that place again, unless forced.

2006-12-21T13:14:00.000+08:00

Elva's so hot, wo ye xiang dui ni biao bai. (HAHAHA)

2006-12-18T13:56:00.000+08:00

My mom woke me up from my deep slumber just to spit a dumb question at my face.

Early this morning, the said person had actually screeched into my delicate ears, hovering around me and cloaking me in darkness, "EH YOUR JAY SEE ARK COURSE IS DRAWING AH?"

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. What an excellent to kickstart a Monday morning. As I chucked her a vicious glare before lazily rolling off my bed, I crawled to the washroom to brush my teeth. With the toothbrush still in my retardfoaming mouth, I crawled back to the living room and glanced at the owl clock. 9:00AM. It's been a billion years since I've gotten up at such an early time and I absolutely have no tolerance for being annoyed by my mom in bright daylight.

I stared at my mom and waited for her to spill what she had wanted to tell me. So she did and as our conversation progressed(for the worse), I became so agitated that I lifted her chin(she was sitting on the sofa) and asked in a muffled tone, "huh? What are you trying to say?!"

I couldn't help but chuckle to myself and walk away while continuing to brush my teeth as she screamed, "YAO XIU AH, LI AH NI DUA DA!” (Good heavens! How disrespectful!)

I told my mom to drop the idea of appealing to JJ but she gave me an ear-deafening lecture and somehow succeeded in her demands in the end. So we first headed off for breakfast at a hawker centre. I turned to her and said very nicely, "don't buy for me. I'm not eating."

"YOU BETTER EAT, I'M BUYING FOR YOU!" she screamed in Chinese, apparently threatened by the calm tone of my voice.

"I told you I'm not eating."

"DON'T ARGUE, YOU'RE EATING. I'M BUYING PRATA," she bellowed fiercely. For a split second I thought what I saw was a Komodo Dragon breathing fire.

"$#%##$^%$, go ahead and buy! I'm not eating." I was instantly pissed off and I stalked off to the empty table at the other side of the hawker centre while some aunties and uncles threw me disapproving looks.

My dad came later and sat down opposite me. Soon my food arrived(my mom went ahead to order her own food), and I simply glared at the food with my arms folded.

"Aren't you eating?" my dad asked monotonously.

"I'm waiting for everyone's food to come before I start eating with everyone," I explained or lied gloomily.

He went on to rattle about how I make him look like he's indebted to me since I was looking very glum and pissy, so eventually I stabbed the fork into my two pratas, sliced it aggressively and dumped it into the curry before chomping down on my food like some retardkid. From a corner of my eye I could see that my dad was observing me pissfully, since I was literally forcing the food into my mouth in large portions, with large prints labelled on my forehead reading: “I’m A Pissed Off & Explosive Object”

After my puke-inducing breakfast, my dad drove us to the nearby 4D/Toto ticket booth. The mention of the word 4D is enough to send me into a fit of irritated spasms. I’m intolerant of people who waste their money on 4D all the time. I mean it’s okay if you buy 4D once in a while, but to do that frequently is a sore in the eye. So while my dad was driving us there, I simply lay down on the backseat of the car and curled up like a disgusting worm and stuffed my face into an imaginary pit of darkness. I did that not because I was sleepy, the main reason was due to the fact that my parents were going to buy 4D and since I was in a bad mood, I decided to lie down and close my eyes and hope I would just calm down.

My dad noticed what I was doing from the whatever-thing-mirror and began to say something about me not sleeping early every night and wasting every morning of my life sleeping like a log. I ignored him and lay still.

Moving on. Half an hour later I was at JJ with my mom and I had to fill in the appeal form. My mom was yapping away noisily and each time she talked to me, I gasped and mumbled to her, "your breath stinks." (I really suspect she didn't brush her teeth properly or something)

I took quite some time filling in the choice of subjects I want to take and it was quite devastating to know that my choices are very limited due to my poor grades. I wanted the geography and literature combination but out of the few geog-and-lit combinations, only one was available for me(unless I decide to take Chinese language and literature too, but CHINESE language and LITERATURE? Is that Literature in Chinese? Oh my god no way.)

My second choice was geography and history. I hate geography alright, but throw this together with history and I would rather kill myself and die. Oh my God, guardian angels I plead and beg you on my knees, please help me and make sure that I don’t end up with this horrible combination.

While my mom was talking to the old folk in the general office, whining about having to appeal because the school I was posted to was too far, it later dawned upon her that the distance difference between PJ and JJ from our place was more or less the same(as suggested by the old folk).

So my mom turned to me with a face full of regrets while I was still filling out the form. “He say travel here one and a half hour also leh! Wah liew…” and she continued rambling on and on. When we got back to my dad’s car, she started asking me if I wanted to cancel my appeal form.

My jaws could literally drop all the way till six feet under after hearing what she had to say. Who was the one who insisted that I appeal to another JC in the first place?!

On my way home, my unsettling stomach made me feel really queasy and I felt like throwing up. All thanks to my mom and her breakfast. I got home and my brother returned home a while later while I was using my computer. He called out to me and passed me a tiny box. My eyes dilated in surprise.

Feng you!!! I finally have a new bottle of ointment. My day is not so bad after all. Wow!!!

2006-12-17T04:56:00.000+08:00

I'm now temporarily hooked onto Jay Chou's 菊花台 because my beloved brother just couldn't stop humming and listening to this particular song nowadays. Whenever the song starts playing in my mind, the next thing that I would naturally be reminded of would be the movie itself, and whenever I'm reminded of that movie, I'll remember the scene where Gong Li appeared - followed by some familiar voice ringing in my mind... a voice which goes, "boing boing."

No, it's not meant to be funny(even if you get the not-supposed-to-be-amusing joke). My current philosophie in life is that you either sleep early or you don't sleep at all. Which is why I'm still wide awake at 5:00AM(even though my brother tried persuading me to turn in). This week had indeed been perfectly wasted. It looks like I'm never gonna get any job at this rate, but to hell with jobs now, I'm just going to be a pampered and spoilt brat and I'm gonna stay that way for good.(even though nobody pampers a baby like me).

I met up with my primary school friends at East Coast Park for the barbecue party last Friday. It was quite odd for me since I didn't really know what to do or say when I reached there. In fact I didn't really talk to many people and only stayed in a small group, and apparently we chucked ourselves aside at another smaller table far away from the majority who were indulged in their own games. I think Madeline said that I had changed, and all I did was to smile and tell her that I change now and then.

Jason was mainly the one doing most of the talking at the table that night since most of us didn't know exactly what to say. All we did was to stone there, mutter a few words, laugh, or walk to the beach and burn anything that was burnable to roast marshmallows for fun. Most of them said that I was being too horribly quiet(I was quite robbed of speech almost the entire day). I've never been known to be the sociable kind of person and I have a habit of hiding at a corner, muttering curses to myself under my breath now and then. Socializing is definitely not my kind of thing. I like to squat on some nice spot and isolate myself from the crowd. When it was around 10PM Luke said he wanted to leave, so Val and I left with him first.

Saturday was well-wasted. I was too broke to go out. Today I'll be too broke to go out too. I wonder if Santa is gonna give any magical cheque book so that I can write as many cheques as I want and withdraw unlimited money from my bank(yes I do have a bank thank you).

Hey, at least I've been quite a good girl these December(and all year round).